Supporters of the China Threat Theory - the belief that China's rapid growth will inevitably lead to conflict - should take time to examine the true benevolence of the People's Liberation Army and their noble efforts to ensure the quality of local fruits.

Far from planning the invasion of Mongolia, the overthrow of the Taiwan KMT bandits or the decimation of Little Japan, they are devoting much of their efforts to the protection of lychees, according to that unrivalled organ, PLA Daily.

The "militia fruit protection squads" are operating in Guangdong, the article claims.

Thanks to my colleague, Run Doggie Dog, for the link.