This is hugely difficult, even for one like me who was born and grew in Sichuan. I'll just give it a try.
1. 秋瓣儿 (sorry)
2. 日不拢耸 (sorry)
3. 铲耳屎 (打耳光, slap someone's face)
4. 胎神 (sorry)
5. 搞不醒豁 (弄不明白, do not understand)
6. 打燃火 (把火点燃, set fire)
7. 抵拢倒拐 (sorry)
8. 古丁爆赞 (sorry)
9. 走展 (sorry)
10. 扯经割孽 (闹矛盾, be on bad terms with)
11. 张花里实 (sorry)
12. 落教 (走正路, be morally sound)
13. 扯靶子 (撒谎, tell a lie)
Haha, what a test! I even only tried six of the 13 items! No hope at all for a bottle, but still I have a good laugh.

秋瓣儿 ----lame man
日不拢耸 ----not dressily
铲耳屎 ----slapping the face
胎神 ----jerk
搞不醒豁 ----cant understand or not really clear
打燃火 ----light the lighter
抵拢倒拐 ----go ahead and turn
古丁爆赞 ----someone who wears ugly and weird
走展 ----still have some place
扯经割孽 ----kinda fight
张花里实 ----someone who wears colorful but overlined
落教 ----be convinced
扯靶子 ----blow up

1. 秋瓣儿
骂某人土气、精神涣散
Autumn petal.
A hillbilly. Rustic, uncouth, and lazy.
2. 日不拢耸
衣着不整
The sun does no approach the heavens.
The clothing doesn't much.
3. 铲耳屎
连耳屎都打出来
The shovel earwax.
To box someone's ears.
4. 胎神
傻瓜的意思
fetus god
Stupid.
5. 搞不醒豁
搞不懂 (this one's similar in 普通话)
to not understand something clearly/explicitly
to not understand how to do something
6. 打燃火
生气
to ignite a fire
to become angry
7. 抵拢倒拐
意思是指没有路就转弯
When you reach a dead end, turn around.
When you come to a fork in the road, take it.
8. 古丁爆赞
大致意思是说装得很满。比如形容一个比较胖的女人穿很瘦的衣服,就可以说她穿得“古丁爆赞”的
The ancient nail explodes and fails to support (presumably the clothing which is about to pop)
Describing clothing that fits too tightly, or moreover the rotund person stretching the clothing. (eg: Fat guy in a little coat!)

9. 走展
有弹性，可以变通
Evolving as you walk.
Flexible; a matter that is not set in stone.
10. 扯经割孽
pull the normal, cut out the abnormal
You've got to accentuate the positive, Eliminate the negative, Latch on to the affirmative, Don't mess with Mister In-Between.
11. 张花里实
When the flowers bloom, it will lead to internal repletion.
Things look better in the springtime?
12. 落教
就是说这个人比较懂事
To fall into education.
To be sensible; to catch on quick.
13. 扯靶子
逞强，说大话
To pull the target.
To brag; talk big.

秋瓣儿 －
日不拢耸 － 窝囊的样子
铲耳屎 － 扇耳光
胎神 － 大声
搞不醒豁 － 弄不清楚
打燃火 － 生气
抵拢倒拐 － 抵满
古丁爆赞 －
走展 － 走过场
扯经割孽 －
张花里实 －
落教 － 得体
扯靶子 － 装腔作势

I didn't cheat via google...
This is all I got from my 20 years in Sichuan.

Shame on me...

And gosh I never heard of the wine importer...

Loads of fun! I'm from Sichuan (not Chengdu) and I find a couple of those not so clear to me. There're many local dialects in different parts of Sichuan. Some of the phrases are more like Chengdu-ese rather than Sichuanese.

Who has this guy been talking to? Lots of dirty language in here. The Mandarin I know seems too stilted to do any of these justice, and I can only think of a few good English translations. I can however, attempt to explain them.

A couple things to keep in mind: 1) most of these are REALLY 土话 and not used that often by anyone less than middle-aged 2) though they're all insults, friends might say these to one another in a teasing kind of way, and 3) I'm from the Southern U.S. so I equate Sichuanese with the dialect of my home.

1. 秋瓣儿- a yokel who just LOOKS stupid.
2. 日不拢耸 - bumpkin. but a cussword.dirty clothes, like the guy who wears the oversized 3 piece suit and smokes the self-rolled and really stinky 叶子烟
3. 铲耳屎- similar to "slap someone upside the head"
4. 胎神 - kinda like retard or 'tard.
5. 搞不醒豁 - can't make head or tails of something. can't make it out. just plain don't get it.
6. 打燃火 - knee slappin' angry. get rough with somebody. i don't really know. haven't heard it much.
7. 抵拢倒拐 - Getting directions is quite possibly the most difficult thing to do in China, and this phrase doesn't make it easier. basically, "go all the way down and hang a left/right" No, they don't tell you which one.
8. 古丁爆赞 - a show off.
9. 走展 - not set in stone. like a price. "how much is that?" "100 kuai. 但是肯定有走展 but i can come down from that"
10. 扯经割孽 - argue. but more like two people who will argue over anything. if there's nothing to argue over they'll find something.
11. 张花里实 - know-it-all, but doesn't actually know-it-all. (sarcastically) mr. smartypants
12. 落教 - usually heard as 不落教. no proper upbringing, no morals, 不厚道, trifling, low-down, etc.
13. 扯靶子 - talk shit. brag. go off at the mouth.

Literal translations of these phrases might be impossible. They are rarely written and when they are some (ESPECIALLY #8) have no standard character. Plus, to a non-speaker they seem like a nonsense collection of characters. I contend that characters were later assigned to Sichuan 土话 with the rise of literacy here. The characters used here and in other words and phrases (which people usually just add a 口 radical to a similar sounding character) may have no relation to the words themselves.

1. 秋瓣儿 hill billy
2. 日不拢耸 shabby-looking
3. 铲耳屎 silly and narrow
4. 胎神 inner tube of tyre
5. 搞不醒豁 don't get it
6. 打燃火 light the stove for hotpot
7. 抵拢倒拐 go straight ahead and turn
8. 古丁爆赞 fat and tight-clad
9. 走展 there is still chance for talk
10. 扯经割孽 chat, gossip
11. 张花里实 somebody, john or jane
12. 落教 (kid) be good; be understanding
13. 扯靶子 absurd

1. 秋瓣儿 指很土的人 没精神 - "autumn pedal" - hick-like, lazy, no energy

2.日不拢耸 - 土包子,很土 - "f***ing earthy" - very out of fashion, uneducated, dirty, hillbilly-like
3. 铲耳屎 - 扇耳光 - "shovel ear sh*t" (ear wax) - slap someone in the face

4. 胎神 - 神经病 - "fetus spirit" - nutcase, fruitcake， generally crazy

5. 搞不醒豁 - 搞不懂 - "can't realize or understand" - to not understand

6.打燃火 - 发火 - "to light a fire" - to become very angry

7. 抵拢倒拐 - 走到路尽头转弯 - "stay close and turn" - walk to the end of the road and turn

8. 古丁爆赞 - no suitable mandarin translation,到处冒出来，不平整 - "exploding at the seams" - overfilled and messy, like a suitcase that has been stuffed full and clothes are sticking out, or improperly dressed with many layers to the point the person looks like an exploded 包子

9.走展 - 宽松，有弹性 –“ walk / move” (zhan in sichuanese is to move) - the ability to change/loosen, room to change

10.扯经割孽 - 吵架不和 - "quarrel and cut relations" - fight, quarrel

11.张花里实 - 章法，道理，规则 - "rules and principles" - rules
12. 落教 - 听话, usually used as 不落教 or 不听话 - obedient, follow the rules

13. 扯靶子 - 撒谎 - "to pull/tear the target" - to lie